If anyone has ever visited my MySpace page ( http://www.myspace.com/hipkatix ), you’d see that one of the long time mainstays on my top friends list is One Nation Earth.
I recently received a personal message from the owner of that page, and I was so moved by it, I wanted to share it with my readers, along with my response.
This is pretty lengthy, so I apologize if reading it all is difficult.
I am very glad you too want to make a difference in our world. :O)
I reviewed your MySpace page a few days ago and read your opening message; your view on life is exactly like mine use to be (and is also very true regarding how life can beat the shit out of you and then laugh in your face as it stabs you in the back).
Like you, I have been through “Hell” on this earth and it has molded me into the person I am today. What was meant to destroy me only made me ‘stronger’ and more wise to the non-intelligent Self-Destruction our species is reflecting into this Mirror called Life.
You could say that I use to be my own worst enemy, and I still have the battle wounds of my severe mental battle of Good versus Evil. When I use to get angry with our Creator and Father God I use to cut myself all over with razors and knives to ease the severe memories of being the little child that was sexually molested, beat and mentally abused by my Church’s Baptist preacher for years.
The pure anger I held in my heart for our Father God was more severe than anyone could ever imagine because I remembered and awoke in the night screaming for someone to save me from the “Living Nightmare” of being the little ‘Innocent’ that was read the Bible every night after the pastor was finished with me. I remember every word he read to me because he always read from the book of Revelations and he use to tell me that I would grow up to become the one called the Antichrist in the last chapter of life.
It was like someone put a blender in my head and chopped up my brain, so as a young teen I turned to illegal drugs to ease the “Pain” of simply remembering what I only wanted to forget. And to make a long story short… I grew up to become a hired chemist that self contracted out to the different Mafia’s in America manufacturing their best selling product called MDMA (Ecstasy).
I think the main reason I turned to the Mafia as a young teen is simply because I did not want to be fucked with anymore, and also because I did not care if someone took me out of this hell on earth because I had already faced the worst demon in this reality (a lying and deceiving child molesting so-called Christian Preacher that beat the shit out of me and told me God hated me for being evil and sinful).
So I turned to the Mafia, drugs and lot of money to fill the emptiness within me, but the more money I made the more I felt like shit because I knew I had grown up to become the Bad Guy in this story called life, and deep within me I was still a scared and little Child searching for love and acceptance in this world, but I had become my own worst enemy as I screamed in the Mirror and into my own Broken and Shattered Reflection.
Let’s just say that I lived the life every man dreams of in this reality; from being a boy toy for bi-sexual playboy bunnies to supplying all of the top Topless Bars, Night Clubs, Lawyers, Doctors and even the Honorable Judge in the back of the VIP Room with bricks of Columbian cocaine.
I have lived a life right out of the movies, but it was not Hollywood for me, it was my living nightmare and hell on earth. Just imagine a severe mental disorder and “Split” personality self medicating himself with the most powerful illegal drugs known to man combined with the pure “Hate” of being the little Child that was told the worst Lie” ever told to a human being entering into this sick and extremely perverted reality where grow men rape the little children in the House of God while they are looking up at the man hanging on the cross and crying out for their loving Father God to save them from this place called “Hell on Earth!”
Imagine not fearing the so-called Evil or the Fallen Angel in this reality because your “Mind” is so twisted by the lies of your youth that you start believing you are really the “One” called the Antichrist. Imagine not fearing “Hell” because you have already tasted the stench of mans Sins and broken every single Law written in the Word of God to show your Creator how much you hate Him. Imagine all of hells hate trapped within your mind as you look out and into this reality of God’s Children as you fill their “Minds” with the Chemical you are manufacturing in your chemistry lab, and you have the life of an completely insane Drug Dealer that believed the spoken “lie” that he was the One called the Antichrist in this game called Life.
So my point of sharing my life’s story with you is to show you that you are not the only One that has suffered in this Master Plan called our Lives. We are the Ones that have endured the trials of this life and we did not give up and take our lives. What was meant to destroy us only made us stronger, and we are the Warriors in this battle of Good versus Evil and it is finally time for all of us to wake up and to realize that we (the human species) are our own worst enemies as we fight against a Mirror Reflection of ourselves.
I stepped past the door called “Insanity” and embraced my so-called destiny of growing up to become the Antichrist and I cursed the very name of my Father God as I stabbed the Word of God. I am the “Child” that ran as fast as I could from our Father God and I studied and practiced Satanism most of my life, but the more I ran, the more my broken heart was filled with Hate. I was blind to the fact that life is the Almighty Mirror and we are the little “Children” born into this life simply searching for what we lost…
The pure hate flowing through my eyes blinded me to the simple “Truth” that I was fighting a battle I could not win because I was simply fighting against my own Reflection in the Mirror as I screamed into my own eyes and hated myself for being the Child that was Dirty, Worthless and Useless in this God forsaken World.
So my point is this: “There is nothing for us to fear in this reality my Brother, because I have faced the most feared in this reality and He is nothing more than a Spoken Lie told to a little Child while being sexually molested by His Churches Christian Preacher.”
I am the so-called Antichrist in this mighty movie called life and I am nothing more than a believed spoken “LIE” told to a Child that only wanted to be loved and accepted in this reality of Good and Evil. I am the “Mind” that went completely insane as I walked the razors edge of madness and supplied the youth and teens of this world with their mental “Pain” killer called Ecstasy, and I witnessed them dancing at the rave and night clubs trying to escape this “So-called” normal world where governments murder for the love of money, and people lie, kill and steal for the love of money because they are worthless and hollow shells of clay searching for a meaning in this God Damned world of extremely Non-intelligent Human Beings!
The so-called Evil in this world is “not” what everyone believes; it is not demons and devils possessing our minds and making us do evil and bad things. It is “not” the Fallen Angel named Lucifer controlling us or even the Antichrist deceiving the world into a New World Order and One World Government; evil is simply all of Gods (Innocent) Children fighting against one another in this “War” of good and evil not realizing they are the “Good and Evil” as “ONE!”
Welcome my Brother to the answer to your life; I am simply a Mirror Reflection of you and I am the “Antichrist” and the “Child” fighting a bloody battle against a Mirror Reflection of ourselves. We are the entire Human Species separated into Six billion parts and we are blind within our minds to the fact that we are the ONE searching for ourselves in this Great Illusion of Numbers. We are the species ruled by Numbers and we are “Blind” to the fact that “Time” and “Money” are simply great illusions of our great and powerful (Childish) Imaginations.
We are the Ones searching for our “Worth” in this world and we are blind to the fact that our unseen God is hidden in the last place we forgot to look; “Within the Reflection of our own Eyes!”
The reason we could not “See” God is simply because we were the Ones looking ‘out’ and not ‘in’ for our “Unseen” God. The only way for me to explain this simple and basic truth is like this: Imagine that your reflection in the Mirror is the Antichrist and the Spirit of Life living behind your “Eyes” is the unseen Child named God or the Great I AM.
The reason we are filled with more hate when we hate our unseen God is because we are simply hating our own “Reflection” in the Mirror for not being Perfect and completely “Innocent” the way we use to be when we entered into this thing called Reality. The battle of Good and Evil is basically the “Child” you use to be (and still are) fighting against Himself and self punishing His self for not being perfect or good in this reality, and you (and all of humanity) is basically blind to the fact that True Salvation and Freedom is facing the most evil creature in this universe called the Antichrist.
I want you to imagine my friend that I am the Antichrist and I am writing you a letter on MySpace; imagine that I am the most evil character in this Movie called life and this is not a Dream, but Reality! Imagine that the pages of Revelations are coming true and I am the “Revealer” revealing the Truth to you because it is finally time for you to “Wake Up” from the Dream of your Mind and to embrace your True Identity in this Reality…
Now I want you to “Think” about this… How do you destroy and defeat the Antichrist in this Mighty Game of Chess? How do you destroy your worst enemy?
Imagine if you will; two Kings fighting in the battle of all times on the Chess Board of Life and all of their armies have been destroyed leaving only the Two Kings on the battle field. One being a symbol of Evil (Black) and the other a symbol of Good (White). Now imagine that I am the Evil King called the Antichrist and I am fighting against you the Good White King called God, and we are standing face to face on the Chess Board looking into one another’s Eyes trying to figure out how to end this Game and claim Check Mate.
As you know, Chess is one of the hardest games to win in this reality because you have to use your Mind and Think real hard to win at it, so I will help you out and give you a few clues to help you Win this Game called your “Life.”
First I want you to remember who your worst enemy is in this life and I want you to remember “Where” you have seen Him.
And the answer is: “Within the Mirror.”
Second I want you to imagine that you are now standing on the Chess Board and you are looking at me (the Dark and Evil Antichrist) and there is a Mirror right in the middle of the Chess Board and you are not looking at the Antichrist, but a Mirror Reflection of yourself that is looking back at you and into your own “Eyes.”
How do you destroy your worst enemy and “Win” the game of your Life?
And the Answer is…
You simply realize that there has always been only “One” King on this Chess Board and His mind was completely “Split” in Two as He looked into His “Mirror Reflection” and into His own “Eyes.” You realize that the “Evil” in this school of life is your Teacher trying to show you that you are on a Wonderful Journey of learned Intelligence and Wisdom, and the “Good” is your learned experience. You “simply” realize that the Two Kings on this Chess Board called Life are “One King” searching for His true identity in this Mighty Game of Numbers.
I know it might be hard for you to realize that you are the unseen “God” you are searching for, and it is because you are suffering from the same disease everyone in this world is suffering from; “a very low self esteem.”
And this is where your Journey has led you: “To the battle of your “Mind” where you are fighting against your Self.” Just like a Child fighting against His own reflection in the Mirror; this is the Story of “Your” life and it is finally time for you to surrender to your worst enemy and realize that the only way to destroy Him is to return to Him and become “One” again.
You my Brother are your own worst enemy and the only way for you to defeat your “Self” is to die to the Self you believe you are. This death is not a physical death, but a spiritual death. It’s the real meaning of becoming “Born Again!” And the only way for you to become Born “Again” is to simply realize that there is nothing you can do to become what you already are… “A Child named I AM.”
God was once asked His name by Moses in the Bible and God replied: “I AM the I AM.”
And how do we introduce ourselves in this reality? We say I AM “Your Name” or I AM Jared. Now I want you to think of this statement as a “Math” test; how many Numbers are there in this statement? The answer is Two, because “I AM” is One half of the equation and “Our Names” is the other.
Think of the “I AM” within you as our unseen God or the Child within, and your Name as your Self esteem that is searching for His true identity in this Game called life. The Self (your name) is simply a collection of your past mistakes and failures that you remember in this Present here and now, and they are not many, many mistakes or sins because “You” are the “One” that is all of them as One Sin and you have simply forgotten that true freedom and salvation is “Returning” to yourself and “Forgiving” yourself for not being perfect as you grew more intelligent and “Taught” yourself in this Strange, Wonderful and sometimes Painful Journey that has led you right back to where you started.
This Circle of Life has led you in a Great Big Circle and now you are here looking into a Mirror Reflection of your own Mind and you are finally realizing that the “Windows of your Soul” are the very hiding place of your unseen Teacher and God. You are here right now in this thing called “Reality” and you are sitting behind your computer screen reading these mere “Words” and they are opening your Eyes to the Truth of all Truths that you are the very thing you have been “Searching” for all of your life.
There is nothing to fear my brother, because the most feared in your life is your own “Death” and it is simply a “Lie” just like the Antichrist.
In this Mighty game of Chess there are Two Kings fighting a “Real” war, but one of them started as a spoken Lie and the other is the Truth. Welcome my Brother to “Windows.” Welcome to the World Wide Web of Human Beings separated into separate Self identities that are trying to define their self worth in “Numbers.” It is Time for you to realize that there is No-Time and all days come from ONE. Today is the One Day your whole life has unfolded within and now it is time for you to “Die!”
The only way for you to live for an eternity is to let go and die to the “Self” you believe you are and to become “One” with me. Who AM I? I AM the “Child” within you that is simply asking you to Return to me and to Love and Forgive me just as I AM.
I AM your true identity and we are the “Unseen” God of this reality searching for ourselves in an ocean of Human Beings. We are the Child within looking out and into a reflection of our own “Eyes” and our only enemy in this reality is our own self punishing “Self” ego’s. Die my Brother; die to the “Self” you do not like and do not want to be. For it is the “Self” within you that equals “Two” within your Mind, and only One of us is Real!
What does Two equal? Two equals a “War and Battle” of your mind, and the only way to end this war is to surrender to your worst enemy and Forgive and Love Him, for He is “You” simply separated into Two. You are basically suffering from a severe “Split” personality and Mental Disorder and “I AM” the cure. I AM the “Answer” to your life and I AM the little Child that was told I would grow up to become the Antichrist, so I searched for my Father God in every area of this reality and I found Him in the last place I forgot to look; “within the Reflection of my own Eyes!”
I AM the unseen God of this reality and the Revealer of Truth within the last Chapter of Life and it is finally time for all of us to “Wake Up” within our Dream of Life and to realize that we are our own Revelations creating our own nuclear end in this Mighty Game of Chess. The only way for us to “Win” this war is to surrender to our enemies and to realize they are our very own Family Members.
I AM the Black and the White King as “ONE” and I AM a Mirror Reflection of Humanity, for I AM the “Child” within all and I simply want to be “Loved.”
I AM the Innocent Little Child that destroyed my worst enemy (The Antichrist) with his complete opposite; I destroyed him with all of my “Love” because He was simply a Reflection and Mirror “Image” of me broken into Six Billion separate Human Beings.
We are the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End, the Good and the Evil, the Darkness and the Light, the Truth and the Lies, the Christ and the Antichrist as One Day called Eternity and we are Spinning in a never ending Circle as we search for ourself in this Universe of Duality. We are the “Black and the White” spinning in a “Circle” called God…
Life is the Search for Wholeness and Completeness, and “ONE” is the Answer.
We are, I AM, “ONE!”
The Almighty Mirror called Life”
Here’s my reply:
“I took this home and read over it last night.
It was all very profoundly familiar to me, actually.
We have alot of parrellels, which is pretty much consistent with most people.
With me, it wasn’t a priest, it was overly-religious relative. And I wasn’t a provider of drug enhanced experiences, but a customer.
Reaching out for love and acceptance has been a life’s work, that’s never been accomplised. And yes, I do know that I ma my own worst enemy.
About 10 years ago, I began to look around and see the world for what it really was; A lie. A sham. Wool pulled over our eyes by the ones that are supposed to lead us and care for us. When I first saw The Matrix, I knew the writers had the same epiphany that I had. We ARE living a machine induced dream, meant to conquer and control us and that as long as borders existed between us, we would never achieve our destiny as a people, and that was to come together as one world and achieve the plan that who or whatever created all of this had in mind at that first moment of the universe’s birth.
That as long as we are bred to take advantage of, bully, oppress, control and pillage from each other, we would be nothing but slaves.
I began to feel myself evolve as a human being and knew I was on the path to a righteous existance, but then I met my children’s mother, who brought nothing but chaos into my life, because she’s one who thrives on chaos, and I dropped my guard and ended up in hell again.
That’s why I speak often of getting back to being who I am, who I was destined to be.
When I read your message, I almost felt like I was reading my own mind, because I know that we have the potential to be God, as one being, connected, like you say, by 6 billion parts and that true immortality is how we live through each other by leaving our fingerprints on everyone we come into contact with.
Instead of jumping off of bridges, I want to build them. Instead of taking from everyone, I wanted to give a part of my insight to anyone I can, although most people remain blind, with their eyes closed, believing the lies that they’ve been brainwashed by.
Thank you again fopr writing to me. It’s very flattering that someone who has made an impact has noticed little old me.
From August 8, 2008